I’ve been doing a whole lot of thinking, from about the turn of the year. I’m a nut for diaries and schedules and organising systems and, in January, I bought a FranklinCovey Planning System. It came with instructions for writing one’s Mission Statement which I duly followed although I can’t now remember what I wrote. And therein lies the problem.
I’ve just finished eight sessions of Counselling (with Counsellor M) and am likely to be starting longer-term Psychotherapy soon. The issue I want to look at is that of my identity. Because I don’t really know who I am. I know my name (things haven’t gotten that bad!) but, if I were to describe myself or introduce myself, I don’t know what comes next: ‘Hello. I’m Laura. I’m …?’ Who I am changes with alarming regularity. I’m a Christian, I’m a Buddhist, I’m a Pagan. And that’s just the religion side of things. I have a whole host of ‘I am’s crowding round and all wanting a shot at life. But my instinct tells me that, if I could get the religion sorted out then a lot of other things would fall into place.
I found this article interesting. The author asks several questions of the reader and states that who we are in eternity is more important than who we are today, here and now.
I read the Bible yesterday – for the first time in a while. It all seemed to be about choices. The Israelites had to choose between God and the Pagan Deities of the surrounding nations. And, when they weren’t sure, God gave them a clear sign of comparison (Baal’s offering wasn’t burned up, God’s was – despite having been dowsed with water).
I think I’m being asked to make a choice. I know God is ‘real’ (for want of a better word). I also know that other Deities are out there. The choice is who I want to follow – for eternity.