Walking on Sunshine

Posts tagged ‘belief’

Staying Power

1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.2Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. – Hebrews 12:1-3 (New International Version) – emphasis added.

I’ve made my decision.  And I’m happy with it.  I know I’m doing the right thing.  But I’m really worried that the decision won’t stick.  I have a history of changing my mind.  Now, I know that’s a lady’s privilege but it’s exhausting and makes me look like a teenager (which is how I feel when it happens).

So I’ve been thinking about ways to keep myself on the road I have chosen:

  1. Go to Mass as often as possible.  I’m lucky enough to have a really good Church within walking distance and they have Mass every morning.  I’m hoping that a daily dose of worship and grace will help.  Plus, I actually really like going to Mass even though I’m really Church of Scotland.
  2. Get to know people at Church.  I keep thinking about the coal that glows hot when it’s in the fire but cools rapidly when it’s alone on the hearth.  St J’s has a newcomer’s event coming up soon and I intend to be there.  I find this kind of thing really, really difficult so would welcome prayers.
  3. Integrative prayer.  I want to make prayer a regular part of daily life.  I’ve printed out some prayers and pictures and have them stuck on the walls, ready to be used.
  4. Bible reading.  I’ve scheduled an hour each evening.

Is there anything else you can think of?  All suggestions will be gratefully received!

Faith is a Choice

So all day yesterday I struggled.  And thought.  And pondered.  And prayed.  I watched EWTN.  Surfed the net – there are some weird things out there.  I tried to read – no concentration.  Would this help?  Would that?  All day yesterday, I struggled.

Eventually, I decided to go to Mass and to go a little early and pray some more.  And that is what I did.

I was surprised to find that one of the Bible readings was the same as that I’d read on Saturday.  Joshua asking the Israelites to choose God or choose to worship the Pagan Deities in the Promised Land.

While the people went forward to receive Communion, I sat quietly.  And I started going through the Apostle’s Creed.  Do you believe this line, Laura?  Do you believe that one?  My sticking point came with the Resurrection.  I believed the rest of the Creed but not that.  And then Mass was over and I came home.

And now I struggled with the Resurrection.  And it occurred to me that I could believe various other unusual, Biblical events.  I could even believe that Lazarus was raised from the dead.  But not Jesus.  I looked at my thought processes surrounding Lazarus.  And I realised that I ‘choose to believe.’  It’s not that I’ve been given any supernatural proof or a feeling or inspiration.  I just read it in the Bible one day and chose to say ‘Yep.  That happened.  That’s what I believe.’

Believing isn’t something that happens to a person.  It’s something they choose to do.  And, today, I choose to believe in the Resurrection.

I choose to follow God.